If we are meeting again it must be under one of the following circumstances:
- All of my bowls and plates are dirty. Luckily all you require is a spoon!
- I am having a chocolate craving, but I am just SO health conscious that I’m going with the healthier choice. You are made out of hazelnuts and skim milk. So duh. Smart food.
- Its raining. Or snowing. Or too sunny. Or too hot. If there’s a way to justify enjoying you, I will find it.
First, I really just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for allowing yourself be passed around a living room from girl to girl during 2 hour long Bachelorette marathons. Thank you for pairing perfectly with Skim milk. And thank you for spreading on everything and anything that I deem appropriate at the time: fruits, every sort of carb imaginable, and cake. You haven’t let this girl down. You have been a constant.
The bottom line of this letter is that I need to clarify something: I both love AND hate you at the same time. You are always there for me when I need you, however after I look down and realize that 3/4 of you is gone I begin to hate you as well as myself. I have no self control when it comes to you, nutella.
I think we should go on a break. This way, next time you go on sale at Target (3 bucks?!) I WILL have self control! I will refrain!
I love you. I just can’t to this anymore.
All of my love as well as unconditional regard,